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Thanks semuanya ...

Temans, saya lega. Beberapa bulan belakangan kepala saya pening. Bertambah pening beberapa hari yang lalu. Well, masalahnya ada di saya, bukan di orang lain. Saya nggak komunikatif terhadap orang lain. Seorang teman pernah mengingatkan saya beberapa tahun yang lalu. Thank you :)

Tapi saya tak bisa segera mengubah kebiasaan itu. Saya cenderung menjauhi masalah, tidak pernah langsung menghadapinya. Selama ini hal itu cenderung tidak berpengaruh besar karena saya bergaul dalam lingkungan yang 'cair' bukan closed community yang setiap kali ketemu dan hang out bareng. So saya dengan enak bisa menghindar dari orang tertentu kalau saya bermasalah dengannya. Akhirnya biasanya masalah selesai sejalan dengan waktu, bukan dengan usaha dan keterbukaan.

Tapi tidak sekarang. Saya ada dalam sebuah closed community. Akrab, selalu hang out bareng, akibatnya saya pening ketika saya tidak bisa menghindar dari masalah. Saya tidak punya tempat untuk melarikan diri.

Hari ini saya senang sekali. Dalam 2 hari, masalah2 yang membuat saya pening berhasil teratasi dengan baik. Awalnya saya tidak berani menghadapi masalah-masalah itu. Bahkan saya sempat berpikir, let me be alone, I don't need anybody, I don't care about anyone else and I don't care about what people think of me. Saya menyalahkan orang lain. Saya mengharapkan orang lain mengerti saya, dan saya tidak berusaha membuat orang lain mengerti. Saya hanya diam dan marah sana sini tidak karuan.

Hmmm, 2 hari ini saya belajar. Tidak mudah untuk memulai pembicaraan. Tidak mudah memilih kata-kata yang enak di semua orang. Saya nyaris menyerah. Tapi ternyata banyak yang membantu saya. Semua berakhir dengan baik. Buat kamu, kamu, kamu, dan kamu, I love you guys :)

Terima kasih untuk memaksa saya belajar. I hope I can be a better person :)

Comments

Anonymous said…
I'm sure you will, Mit. I will pray for you.

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